Setting Boundaries For Better Well-Being

“It’s just one thing, it’s no big deal.”

These are some words that might have tricked us at some point. We may have gotten used to allowing small yet important boundary violations to slip by unnoticed. Eventually, that one thing becomes two other things, and before we know it, we’re stuck in a situation we don’t want to be in.

If we’re fortunate, the situation may resolve itself with little difficulty. These situations can be easily avoided if we’ve managed to draw the line by setting boundaries early on. However, if luck isn’t on our side, we’ll have to navigate forward, perhaps carrying the guilt of being perceived as the bad guy in the scenario.

So, how can we start setting boundaries while maintaining positive relations? Here are some tips to keep in mind.

 

Define Your Limits

knowing your limits when setting boundariesRelationships play a pivotal role in everyone’s lives. These directly affect how we perceive and respond to the world. In order to sustain a healthy relationship, we should learn how to establish clear boundaries for ourselves and the people around us.

While it’s true that not every favor or request is done in bad faith, it’s essential to recognize when our boundaries are being tested or crossed. More often than not, these things start with simple actions and then grow into larger issues if left unchecked.

The best way to start this journey is through self-reflection. Take time to explore your values, principles, and non-negotiables. Reflect on past experiences where you felt overwhelmed or taken advantage of, and identify the boundaries that could have prevented those situations. By defining your limits, you gain clarity on what you’re willing to accept and what crosses the line for you.

 

Learn to Say “No”

Setting boundaries doesn’t have to be a big adjustment in your life. It can simply be modifying the responses you’ve grown accustomed to saying. One of the most important things you can learn is how to say “no”. This allows you to evaluate and express what you are and are not comfortable with.

There will be times when you’ll be pushed over your limits, and it’s important that you’re honest with what you’re feeling and how this is affecting you. In this way, you do not only prioritize yourself, but you also teach others to be aware of what they’re doing.

 

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Additionally, being comfortable with saying “no” removes the guilt when declining certain requests and invitations. It frees you from the burden of feeling obligated to say yes to everything, allowing you to make choices based on what truly aligns with your priorities and values. Remember, playing the “nice guy” doesn’t always get you the respect that you deserve.

 

Know When to Put Yourself First

put yourself first when setting boundariesPrioritizing yourself is also an act of self-respect. It means that you honor your needs, values, and limits despite what others might force upon you. By doing this, you acknowledge that your well-being matters and is also deserving of attention and care. Truthfully, nothing is more rewarding than giving in to what you truly want.

There are times that you’ll feel guilty when you put yourself over others, however, it’s vital to understand that it’s not being selfish but a mere practice of self-care. Eventually, as you get used to honoring your boundaries and putting yourself first, that overwhelming guilt will be replaced with satisfaction and empowerment.

 

Understand That People Come and Go

Throughout our lives, we encounter numerous individuals, each with their own impact and significance. Some people bring positivity, joy, and support into our lives, enriching our experiences and contributing to our growth and happiness.

However, it’s also true that not all relationships are positive or lasting. Some may bring stress or conflict, causing emotional strain. By acknowledging this, we gain a deeper perspective on human connections; we eventually learn who to value and to let go of.

If the relationship has stopped contributing to your self-growth, it may be worth reassessing its role in your life.  Perhaps there are areas where both parties can invest effort or make changes, creating more room for growth and transformation.

 

The Importance of Setting Boundaries

setting boundariesThere are a lot of benefits to establishing healthy boundaries in your life. Oftentimes, these positive changes are instantly felt and seen. This practice, in many ways, gives you structure and a sense of order. At some point, you’ll see how this pushes you to gain more control in your life and your interaction with other people.

In the article by Chad Buck, he discusses the correlation between setting and enforcing personal boundaries and respecting the boundaries of others. He emphasizes that individuals who are adept at establishing and upholding boundaries are less prone to encroaching on others’ boundaries. This practice enables individuals to be perceived authentically, rather than conforming to others’ expectations.

Buck highlights that effective boundary-setting lays the foundation for healthy relationships. By taking charge of establishing more effective boundaries, individuals open themselves up to a wider array of choices and opportunities, leading to reduced stress and increased engagement overall.

He also listed great things that happen after setting boundaries in place:

 

In the end, it’s very important that we put value in our needs and what we’re feeling. Nothing should be worth sacrificing your mental well-being over. You don’t want to live a life where you’re constantly burnt out or feeling taken advantage of. Living a fulfilling life means surrounding yourself with individuals who recognize your value and treat you with the respect you deserve.

By asserting your boundaries and surrounding yourself with supportive individuals, you create an environment that nurtures your mental health and fosters personal growth. After all, when we prioritize our well-being, we empower ourselves to lead happier, more fruitful lives.

 

 

About Author:
Paul Jenkin | Life Coach & Somatic Facilitator
With 26 years of experience in alternative health and personal development, Paul coaches entrepreneurs and creatives to let go of limiting programming and empower themselves to reach greater levels of personal freedom, peace and success.

Author of ‘Heartfelt Manifestation’– he enjoys sharing information about a whole range of topics from LOA, optimal health, emotional intelligence, self-sovereignty and business. Schedule a 1-hr Expansion Call Today!

 

 

References:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/setting-boundaries-benefits_n_57043126e4b0b90ac27088bb

https://www.vumc.org/health-wellness/resource-articles/establishing-effective-personal-boundaries

 

 

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